Oops! Not Again

This article was birthed from a conversation I had with a coworker regarding being judgmental. We were discussing what types of attitudes one should have, who among some of the people we know has a judgmental attitude (by the way I know about gossip and slander), and what types of discourse or arguments could be considered judgmental or not. Since we could not really agree completely on the issue, we decided to pat ourselves in the back by saying to each other, “Speaking one's mind and saying the truth doesn't mean that one is judgmental.” It was a poor consolation because we tended to consider each other as having judgmental attitude.

Although it was the end of the conversation, that issue was not over for me. In reality how do people know if they are judgmental or not? I remember reading so many passages in the bible that I could consider being judgmentally condemning. I remember reading bible verses warning people of judging each other, and others warning them of not judging one another (Matthew 7:1-2; 1 Corinthians 5:12-13). What is the truth of the matter if one can really find it? Since I was not sure I really understand what the word means, I picked my dictionary to look at the definition of the words judging and judgmental. I found out that the words can be taken positively or negatively.

We often tend to take the words judging and judgmental negatively, but there is a positive aspect to the word judging or being judgmental. By the way, let me provide a couple of definitions for some of you reading this article who are unsure about the meaning of the word judgmental. The word judgmental can be taken positively or negatively. I have chosen these three definitions of judgmental that I have accepted to be true for me among the many given positive explanations. Judgmental is defined, (1) the act or an instance of judging, (2) as the ability to form an opinion objectively and wisely; (3) of an opinion, estimate or notion. The word judging is (1) to form a judgment or opinion of or upon, (2) to think or hold as an opinion (3) to form an opinion or estimate. One negative definition of the word judgmental is to criticize or condemn. Now as you tend to judge people's actions or words, make sure that you are not making the negative comments your state of mind.

I believe that judgment can be passed only on someone's actions or words, but not the person. Only Jesus can judge someone because He knows people's heart and motives for their actions. As I was thinking about Jesus and His ways, I took my bible to find out some of the comments He and John the Baptist have pronounced that have caused this strange emotion in me and my eyebrows to raise as I was reading them. There are many statements by the prophets, and other people of God that could cause your mind to also wonder. But I want to relate to a few comments from Jesus and John the Baptist. Let's go to some of them and see if you can think that they were judgmental.

In Matthew 16 verse 23 one can see Jesus telling one of His chosen disciples who did not even understand of what spirit he was, when he was telling the Lord that he should not die, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men.” Matthew 23 outlined the many words of Jesus to the leaders of the law and Pharisees who were called, hypocrites, blind guides, white washed tomb, snakes, brood of vipers, et cetera. In Matthew and Luke 3 verse 7 we see John the Baptist telling the people, “You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?” He even used the same three words, “brood of vipers,” that Jesus used in speaking to the teachers of the laws. All can read in Luke 11 verse 44 one of Jesus warnings to some of the people He was dealing with. It goes, “Woe to you, because you are like unmarked graves, which men walk over without knowing.” In John 8 verse 44 he even tells the Pharisees, who did not believe in Him, that they are of their father, the devil, and that they wanted to carry out their father's desires. Some of the Pharisees was even aware that Jesus was insulting them (Luke 11:45). Now what do you make of these few examples?

The verses you just read seem to me quite insulting. What a stinging rebuke! But because I know that Jesus loved all people, knew people's heart and He could tell of their duplicity, He had the right to expose them and be angered at them. Because I know that He was God in the flesh, and made all human on this planet, His comments are all acceptable to me. But what about John the Baptist? Probably the Father has provided him some insights that allowed him to say what he said. Since he was a prophet of God, I know that he was speaking from the mind and heart of God. Since the Father recorded it in the bible for instruction, this is also acceptable to me.

Now, what about me? Do I have the right to judge when I don't know what is in someone's heart, and when I don't know the person's motive for acting a certain way or making a comment? I know that I don't have the right to condemn and criticize people negatively, but I know that I am completely free to state my opinions on what I see and hear, especially when it can effect positive changes. The Lord has used circumstances, other people and His Word so many times to teach me, help me conquer negative situations, and work with the issues in my life. I am still striving with many, but I am also a work in progress. Thanks Jesus!

Since wisdom is proved right by her actions, I tend to accept that people's actions speak louder than words (Matthew 11:19). Although I try not to be condemning, how can I ignore issues and stop myself from personal opinions when I see what I see, hear what I hear, and notice that actions taken or words spoken are often not in agreement with the Word of God. I rather follow Jesus' advice to judge for myself what is right (Luke 12:7.) And I strive to do that in all situations where I am involved. Even the apostle Paul states in 1 Corinthians 5 that we are to judge those inside the church calling themselves brothers who are sinning, and not the people in the world who do not have a relationship with Jesus.

Now where am I getting at? What do you think of Jesus and John the Baptist statements read earlier? You know that if you say they were negative, that you are condemning Jesus and John the Baptist. Be honest with yourself, what really came to your mind? Would you dare find faults with God? Now are you prone to double talk, or do you speak your mind truthfully? Are you like me thinking at times, Oops! not again, after having judgmental thoughts. If your answer is yes, just try not to be the one to throw the first stone at yourself. We all pass judgments and have judgmental attitudes. If your answer is no, then be the first liar to declare that the statement is untrue.

Being judgmental to me is not being critical or condemning. I believe that judgment can be passed on someone's actions or words, but not the person. Father has given a spirit of wisdom and discernment to His children that they must use in their interactions with others. Although it is important to be kind, and have tact as people present their opinions to others, I know that it is not being critical or condemning to speak the truth in love (Proverbs 12:17, 19). Since I have a tendency to blurt out a comment and think afterwards, I need God's help and His wisdom in my life to be a person with edifying and refreshing words for all. In my journey with the Father, I am still learning to have my speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt (Colossians 4:6). What about you?

As I go through my journey, I declare that God did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind. Being watchful of my own attitude, I have decided that I will lift up my voice, cry out, spare not, and reveal to the people actions contrary to the Word of God whenever and wherever the Father commands.

Blessed are those who hear the Word of God and obey it! (Luke 11:28)

Marie Monaus 8 Mar '09